


Cassiopeia’s Sky

by vestyr



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Tragedy, Character Death, Death, F/M, Hurt Derek Morgan, Hurt Spencer Reid, Reader-Insert, Sad Ending, Sad Spencer Reid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:34:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26118082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vestyr/pseuds/vestyr
Summary: When you make a mistake, you never imagined it would be your last. In your final moments, Spencer enjoys a lifetime with you.
Relationships: Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid, Spencer Reid/David Rossi, Spencer Reid/Reader, Spencer Reid/You
Comments: 3
Kudos: 74





	Cassiopeia’s Sky

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this at 3 am so please excuse any bad grammar! Go follow my Tumblr @reidemandweep, I'll be posting all my fics from there onto here before I write anymore <33
> 
> wc: 1.2k

Spencer still remembers the very first words you ever said to him.

You were both 3 years old, and you had noticed spencer sitting alone on a bench, instead of playing on the playground like the other kids. So, tiny toddler you waddled up to him and started a conversation the best way you knew how to; you told him about your favorite thing in the whole wide world.

“I’m gonna touch the stars one day!” you exclaimed, pointing up at the sky with a chubby finger.

What Spencer didn’t know was you remembered it too. You remembered the exact face he made when his brain processed the fact that somebody voluntarily talked to him.

The skin around his eyes and nose scrunched up slightly, mouth turning into a dubious frown. It’s still the same face he makes when he’s stumped by something during a case, or he’s in a particularly ambitious game of chess against Rossi.

If only that moment could have lasted forever. Spencer would give anything to be stuck in that same moment in space and time, sacrifice it all to go back to when you were not here, in a clearing, dying in his arms.

“Hey, hey, stay with me,” Spencer gently lifts your head from its position on his arm. He could tell you were drifting in and out of consciousness; gods was it hard to watch.

He looked on hopelessly as the crimson liquid spread throughout your FBI vest. He should never have let you come without telling Hotch.

The BAU was chasing a serial killer who stabbed his victims once in the stomach, then left them to bleed out alone in the middle of the woods. You had a hunch about who it was, but no one seemed to be willing to listen to you. So, you took matters into your own hands.

Spencer had watched as you silently slipped by everyone reviewing evidence for the millionth time, or trying to go over any electronic trace with Penelope. Frustration ran rampant within the team.

In the upcoming years of Spencer’s life, he would never forgive himself for not reacting faster, and not telling hotch where either of you were going. He would spend nights simply wondering what would have happened if he had taken the initiative to find you just a few minutes before he actually did.

“Spencer,” the raspy tone of your voice caught his attention. “Can you do something for me?” you asked. Reid looked into your eyes and knew he couldn’t deny you.

He nodded silently, scared his vocal cords would fail him.

You mustered up a smile, too weak to move. “Close your eyes,” you instructed, watching to make sure he followed your directions. When he did, you continued. “It’s 7 pm and you’re picking me up for our first date.”

You felt spencer’s sounds of protests coming before you heard them. His eyes flickered open, lips parting in a confused O shape. 

“Please, just listen to me,” you begged. Once again, Spencer complied and shut his eyes. You cleared your throat. “I’m wearing your favorite dress and your favorite perfume. My mom’s ring is on my right index finger and my grandpa’s necklace is around my neck, because you know I don’t go anywhere without them.” You have to pause for a second, growing weaker by the second.

“Now we’re getting married,” you venture, feeling spencer still slightly. “It’s small, because you get uncomfortable with a lot of people around. You let me pick the venue because frankly, you didn’t care where it’s going to happen. I choose a little cottage themed chapel by the beach. We’re surrounded by our friends and family. When they tell us we can kiss each other, you give me the stupidest little grin before leaning in and giving me the most perfect kiss to date. I tell you I love you because I do.”

At this point, both yours and Spencer’s eyes are welling up and overflowing. He can tell you’ve started to enter a sort of dreamy, delirious state of mind.

You look up at the sky, and Spencer can see your favorite constellation reflected in your tears. He sucks in a breath, chest shuddering as he releases it slowly.

It seems as though it takes your whole spirit to say these next few words. 

“I love you, Spencer Reid. I’ve loved you since the second grade, when you gave me the homework answers to the multiplications table I just couldn’t figure out. I’ve loved you since we were 12, and you were leaving for college. I cried so hard, I thought you would forget about me,” you chuckled slightly, still out of breath.

Spencer clears his throat, sadness and regret blooming in his chest. “I’m sorry, y/n. I’m sorry I never told you that I loved you. I’m sorry that I’ve never shown you how much I care about you. I’m sorry that I couldn’t save you because I was too slow. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” his head fell, sobs emanating from deep within. “I love you, y/n.”

He looked up when you didn’t respond. You were still staring at the stars, this time with a joyful smile etched on your face.

“y/n?” Spencer asks tentatively.

This seems to shake you out of your stupid. You turn to look at him, confusion clouding your gaze.

“Spencer?” you ask. “Why are you crying?”

He opens his mouth to respond, but you talk over him.

You give a little laugh. Well, as much of one as you can give. “You’re so silly, Spence. I told you I was going to touch the stars one day, didn’t I?”

And just like that, it’s like someone punched Spencer square in the chest. The air knocked out of his lungs, he looks down at you. You look up at him, and he can see the brief moment of clarity Death has granted you.

Spencer would later try and describe the emotions he felt during that split second in words, but it never felt quite right. It was a feeling so deep and so… sincere that he half thought he just imagined it.

He finally understood the Greek myth of soulmates. He finally understood why humans spend so much of their time looking for another to love. It was all worth it when you feel the feeling that only lasts a millisecond, the feeling that soothes your nerves and whisks away any stress. The feeling that replaces anger and sorrow with only the purest of love and the happiest of joy. 

As spencer stared down into your eyes, he thanked all the gods he never believed in for this last moment with you. As if Thanatos himself appeared in front of him, he knew it was time. 

You knew it too. With a slight nod, as if acknowledging your fate, the fight left your already weak body. You fell limp into spencer’s trembling arms, deadweight as he slowly cradled you against him.

The rest was a blur of red and blue. It felt we though he blinked, and suddenly Morgan was at his side, shaking him. Spencer looked down, shocked to find you not in his arms anymore.

Frantically, he turns to Morgan, who just gives him a sad nod.

“She’s gone, kid.”


End file.
